Shotzbarger Number
    n. - A cardinal enumeration of dating-relationships-gone-awry.

shotzinky:  yeah, so Number One kept me up all last night whining about
    stuff.  Number Two's been ok for a while; i think she's found her own
    Number Two.  Number Three is traveling here from North Dakota to
    visit me this weekend. .. and.. oh my god, steve.  i need a penguin.
    i'm taking your penguin.  help me, penguin!  protect me!

smokris:  brian, you've already taken my ``bridge structures'' poster.
    surely that is nerdy enough in itself to provide sufficient repellent.
    it's been successful for me.

shotzinky:  i need the penguin, steve.  the bridge isn't working!
    and, i mean, look at this place here.  you're surely not going to
    miss the penguin.

      - 2005.01

Whereto from here?

Not Quite Entirely Antiquated: Some of the Usual Suspects:
(brought to you in Alphabetical Order by Surname)
Ancient History: